BAD IDEA OLYMPIAD Subscribe to Leanna Orr's The Allocator here |
Give me your worst. Literally, what is the worst investment idea you can conjure up for the next 12 months? As nonprofit investors gawp at fiscal year returns so ostentatious they look like typos, making money is, well, incidental. My bartender is a day trader. But even Gary can’t lose right now. So who could? Dear Allocator readers, you are about to find out. I officially declare open the first-annual Bad Idea Olympiad. The world’s best investors, doing their worst investing. You’ll recognize many of the contestants. These cool-headed and long-termist institutional leaders gamely agreed to set aside their good practices & put forth their biggest stinkers. Their picks range as widely as their mandates, from public pension CIOs and woeful long bonds to niche crypto turds. (“Hex coin,” said family office chief Al Hemmingsen. “Because while there are many shady crypto projects, only one has direct mailed their propaganda to my house.”) It’s a year-long race straight to the bottom. Here are the rules... Objective: The lowest one-year absolute return. Time Frame: August 1, 2021 to July 31, 2022 Universe: Anything — single security, levered private fund, commodity, crypto, or a boring old asset class — with at least quarterly valuations or an acceptable benchmark. Ted Seides would like to note for the record that his benchmark is a shoddy facsimile bloated $1B+ private companies, but nothing better exists. Game Plan: The Allocator is honored to bring you updated performance rankings each quarter. On the one-year anniversary of the newsletter’s launch, I will announce the winner. Prize Purse: A full-ride scholarship to Ted Seides’ brand-new Capital Allocators University (street value of $2.5k now; $5k as it nears hard-close). The program features industry luminaries — Scott Malpass, Annie Duke, & more — teaching the non-investing elements of being a wicked-good capital allocator. But Ted’s generous donation has a catch. To claim the prize, you have to beat him, too. Hardware: In addition to the scholarship, the winner will be awarded a trophy roughly the size of the Stanley Cup. — My thanks to each of the esteemed and important allocators for taking part in this jaunty caper. If you enjoy watching competent people attempt dumpster fires, please send me your feedback & start thinking of your best bad idea for 2022. Competitors, I wish each of you the very worst of luck. |
THE OLYMPIANS |
|
![]() ![]() ![]() |
|
NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Liz Tulach Deputy CIO Boeing Cash NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Donna Snider CIO Hackensack Meridian Health US Fixed Income (Bloomberg Barclays Agg) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Molly Murphy CIO Orange County Employees Retirement System 30-Year US Treasury NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Robert Thompson Senior Portfolio Manager, Credit UPS Group Trust 30-Year US Treasury NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Peter Madsen CIO Utah School & Institutional Trust Funds Long-Duration US Treasuries (S&P US Treasury Principal STRIPS 20-30 Yr Bond Index) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Susan Ridlen CIO Lilly 10-Year US Treasury NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Anne Shelton CIO American Trading and Production Corporation 10-Year US Treasury NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Novisi Nirschl Director of Investments Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center US High Yield (Barclays US High Yield Index) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Valbona Schwab Senior Partner (incoming) Grinnell College Performing Credit (50% Merrill HY Master II / 50% Credit Suisse Leveraged Loan Index) NAME Organization Asset (Benchmark) @InstAllocator Anon Twitter Influencer *Mystery Institution* Small-Cap Growth Stocks (iShares Russell 2000 Growth ETF) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Geoffrey Love Head of Venture Capital Wellcome Trust GameStop NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Sam Gallo CIO University of Maryland Steel Futures (US Midwest Domestic Hot-Rolled Coil Steel Index Futures) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Randy Kim CIO Rainwater Foundation Silver (iShares Silver trust ETF) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) John Greaves Head of Investment Strategy & Research RMPI Small-Cap Gold Miners (Direxion Daily Jr. Gold Miners Index Bull 2X Shares) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Ted Seides Founder Capital Allocators Podcast; ex-Yalie Venture-Backed Unicorns (Cambridge Associates US VC Late & Expansion Stage Index) NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Craig Dandurand Head of Debt Future Fund Bitcoin NAME Title Organization Asset (Benchmark) Al Hemmingsen CIO Parkland Management (Single-Family Office) HEX crypto token |